I did not provoke
the punch to my heart
nor did I expect
the emptiness; the cleft
.
Like a T-Shirt snagged
on a roses thorn
when finally released
a gaping hole was left
.
on a roses thorn
when finally released
a gaping hole was left
.
Though you were hurting
and I knew you would go
I never did think
I'd feel such a loss
.
and I knew you would go
I never did think
I'd feel such a loss
.
I try to remember
all that you went through
you thought I was burdened
yet were never my cross
.
all that you went through
you thought I was burdened
yet were never my cross
.
Early that morning
I was wakened from sleep
and knew that the call
could be nothing but bad
.
I was wakened from sleep
and knew that the call
could be nothing but bad
.
In the short time it took
to jump out of bed
and run to the phone
I was already sad
to jump out of bed
and run to the phone
I was already sad
.
They all say you're better
no longer in pain
I wish I could see it
as beautiful travel
.
no longer in pain
I wish I could see it
as beautiful travel
.
The last memories I have
are of you in that bed
staring at nothing
my fear you'd unravel
.
are of you in that bed
staring at nothing
my fear you'd unravel
.
I'm sure I should heed
the words that I spout
to those that I counsel
it just seems so rough
.
the words that I spout
to those that I counsel
it just seems so rough
.
I know you are painless
that's great but I know
your last endless days
like sinew were tough
.
that's great but I know
your last endless days
like sinew were tough
.
I guess it will take time
for the horror to subside
when memories turn nice
I knew that it would
.
for the horror to subside
when memories turn nice
I knew that it would
.
I must remind myself
minute by minute
that although the pain has shifted
for you, "it's all good"
minute by minute
that although the pain has shifted
for you, "it's all good"
.
.
Thank you for all the love you've freely given to me, for all the times you've held me when I was in pain, for just being my father...I will miss you dad.
18 comments:
and it is all good... to be released from quantity as opposed to quality of life... i know the emptiness, the jagged edges of grief,, but i also know,, it was my loss i mourned... never his gain......
Your grief is palpable. So sad! Yet you are generous in spirit, knowing he is at rest.
Beautifully done. The grief and emptiness are there. I can feel them.
May the emptiness be filled with memories of the good times very soon.
The grief written here is palpable. Tender, touching with unmistakeable yearning and hope. Well done...
your last endless days
like sinew were tough
I love this simile!
Sad, sad, sad.
I am sorry for your loss, the pain and sadness in this is felt dearly as is the love you held for your father.
your words have touched me deeply
i still have not gotten over my dad's sudden departure. i'm not sure i ever will.
thanks for sharing such a heartfelt writing
Holy crap!! Well I always come here for a dose of reality. I got it again. Always powerful stuff here at "death are us". Glad this is the lighter side.
thank you for sharing your raw and honest truth so beautifully.
I lost my 87 year-old father just over a month ago, and I'm still grieving. Your words spoke to me. Thank you for them.
--Gay
I'm touched.
My dad died almost 20 years ago. You've given words to my feelings I had.
Full of feeling - Lovely.
*hugs*
I'm so sorry.
I wish I could see it
as beautiful travel
I really like those lines. It's so hard to see that ... and maybe it's OK to not be able to.
heavenly poetry for such a grieving pain...
It's a wonderful expression of grief
We had five days when my dad died--just enough time to let him go a bit--and no time when my mom went--still feel it often and it's been six years
I haven't lost a parent but, I do understand the grief that comes with losing someone close. I am so sorry for your loss, deathsweep. Time does fill that emptiness inside of us and the memories that rush forth won't hurt nearly as bad. But, it does take awhile. I hope you find solace in your memories soon.
I couldn't comment when I read it the first time. I couldn't see beyond my tears. I lost my dad and know how it feels. I miss him.
This was beautiful and sad at the same time. The "punch to the heart" reminded me how I felt when I was told my grandma had died.
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