Mistaken identity

A fellow was playing with fire
by giving in to his desire
He stripped off his drawers
while in the outdoors
and streaked in pale wrinkled attire.

Time's up!

A man thought it time to take stock
of the date as he set his clock
his taxes filed late
he knew not his fate
He'd better call H&R Block

Can't trust internet dating sites!

A gal had to cancel her plan
to study in depth the Koran
Osama now dead
was shot in the head
He'd said he now lived in Bhutan

A yard by any other name

This week at MadKanes the promt is either yards or gardens. I decided to do one on each however both mentioning yards, yet still different types of yards.

.

.....Limerick

..
Whoever invented the game
would likely think I were lame
since three hundred yards to me
is farther than I can see
and of course running it's sadly the same
.

.....Haiku

.
Trimming lawns and yards
has never been an option,

I have no mower

Countdown

A mere second more

is all that I really want

just to say "so long"

.

.

.
.
I never really knew
left was oh so few
blessed hours
time empowers
emotions now askew

Searching

This prompt is compliments of Mad Kanes Humor Blog and asks for a Limerick and Haiku about a bad job or jobs you have had - here's what I came up with:

Haiku

Door to door salesmen

often have black and blue toes

and hate the word "NO"

Limerick

When first I met a conveyor belt
it gnawed my hands, left many a welt
I just wanted to quit
tell them all to "eat shit"
til I'd recall the rent where I dwelt