The sunniest days are sometimes the darkest
depending upon where my head awakens each morning
The locale and the weather mean nothing at all
since I've begun to carry the storm inside of me
Memories spin as rampant as an out of control child's top
occasionally crashing into an unforeseen barrier
Causing the gashes that have begun to scab over
to once again ooze hurt, regret, fear and self pity
I know what causes each and every moment of distress
yet for some reason I cannot turn away from the wreck
Like a moth that is attracted to the flame that will sear it
I find I'm attracted to the thoughts that will burn me as well
I want to remember and want to forget all at one time
but for some reason my brain keeps undermining my wants
Seemingly preventing me from forward movement
constantly knocking me back to where it thinks I should be
I know I can't push it but each day without her feels empty
as if the core of my body is gone; has just withered away
I'm sure that some day I will once again find happiness
once I start beginning to feel and do and be me...just me
1 comment:
being just you is a great start. it's difficult to lose someone close to us and learn who we are supposed to be without them.
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