No green card needed

I know that we can't be alone
to think this we'd be ever so pompous
West of the moon, South of Cancun
I"ll bet they travel without a compass
.

What makes them all so gosh darn choosy
must I be driving a pick up truck
Perhaps I need a wife named Pearl
or maybe it's just plain 'ole luck
.

I'd gladly take them to my leader
all they'd have to do is ask
I'd even undergo some testing
don't they think I'm up for the task?
.

I could make millions selling my story
if they would let me snap some pics
All they'd have to do is pose
not perform strange farout tricks
.

Aside from the money and front page press
I think that this would be so rad
To end up with a martian penpal
would as they say it, be oh so "bad"
.

So if you know an alien or two
you just might want to steer them my way
because I know I'd love to meet them
and also sure I'd make their day!